A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
