your thong is hanging out like whoa
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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