I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
