Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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