just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
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