I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I just found puke in my bra..
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
