I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
