she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize
