The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Randomize
