Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
