you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
