a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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