I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize