Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
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