I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
