would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I woke up under a house in Key West
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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