that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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