bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Randomize
