I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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