I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
PANTIES FOUND
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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