I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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