just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
