WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
