i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
