I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize