I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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