Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Randomize
