So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Randomize
