So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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