I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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