I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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