This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
