How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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