I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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