you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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