If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Randomize
