Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
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