Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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