just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
