somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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