Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Bring me that man meat
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
