No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
