Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Randomize
