And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
