Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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