do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
