he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
