Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
We need a shit load of segways right now
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
My dick has a subreddit
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
