I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
