Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize